a tale of two drawers

A friend commented on my nicely organized kitchen drawer one day while I was making soup for the both of us.  BUT, I confessed I also had a messy one right next to it.

Let’s start with the small drawer.  This drawer is doing what it was created to do.  It takes time to find what I’m looking for.  It isn’t as nice to open & look at.  It is wasting a lot of space it was given.  Much more could be stored in here if a little time was taken, organized the drawer and maintained it. 

Now let’s look at the large drawer.  This one contains a lot of items.  At one glance I can pretty much see everything in it and know where everything is. It is easy to reach in and get just what I need.  It is nicely fulfilling its purpose isn’t it? Its well taken care of.

This got me thinking how many different kinds of kitchen utensils there are out there.  Kitchen gadgets are numerous and how many different gifts and personalities are in the body of Christ.

Jar opener:  Some of you need help getting your “lid” opened so others can enjoy the benefits of what has been contained inside, sitting on the shelf collecting dust.

Strainer:  Sometimes we need help sifting out the unwanted.  Unless you practice using your gift you never get to the good stuff.  Perfect it.  This takes time.

Sandwich press:  This one seals two pieces of bread together and contains the contents inside.  God has given us the pieces to put everything together BUT without the Holy Spirit it doesn’t stay intact.  We absolutely need Him to be a part of it.

Oven thermometer:  This one tells us we are right on.  We’re ready.  It is the word of God.  He will never contradict again his word.  If it is edification or a correction (which I see as an edification too) it will always line up with God’s word.  If you receive something for someone the most faithful thing you can do with it is to test it and bring it before God.  Don’t quench the spirit by disobeying Him and delivering something but you can also quench the spirit by ignoring a word for yourself.  You just might miss out.

Broken pitcher plunger:  This one has been broken. It isn’t fulfilling its purpose.  It needs the other pieces to function, to do its job.  I think this is one of the most important.  If it is all alone what good is it.  It really is useless.  Why do I have it still?  I can order replacement parts.  You can get plugged in again.  There is hope. 

Pie/cake server:  Be the gift of a servant to someone else.  When it cost you something.  Love others more than yourself.  It’s hard to love others more than us.  I’ve been working on just trying to love others 50% of the time as much as I love me and have failed. 

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Mark 14:3-5

Another piece of advice that is important is to ask God yourself and seek out from Him what you are to be faithful with.  Don’t let others alone tell you what you should do.

As a younger Christian I attended a church where I was told where to serve, what my gifts were and how they should be used. AKA what areas of ministry needed filling.  I listened to man and not God directly.

Romans 8:28

I am called according to God’s design and purpose.  NOT other’s purpose.

For me gifts are about a deeper relationship with God.  When I started talking to God and seeking Him for how He desired me to further His kingdom is when I started really growing in my relationship with Him.  I had much more peach and joy as well.  Don’t get me wrong, others should see be able to acknowledge and even encourage you what your gifts are but don’t let them alone tell you.  Ask God for yourself.

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The point is, do something.  Use what you have.  I can’t do your part.  You can’t do mine.  I answer for me.  You answer for you.  Tell the jar opener to sift.  It can’t.  Tell the thermometer to seal the items together.  It impossible.

Luke 19:26

………if you want to increase your drawer capacity be faithful with what you’ve been given.  If you want it taken away don’t listen. OUCH.

premature enjoyment

God’s timing is the best, period!  When you try to enjoy something premature, you don’t get all of the benefits. 

I was so excited when construction on my deck began I could hardly stand it.  Now, let me explain so you understand my excitement.  I lived in a house for three summers with a beautiful backyard and a space where an existing deck used to be.   It had to be torn down because of poor planning.  All of that work, time and money – WASTED! Getting ahead of God and not letting Him direct your steps will cost you lots of work, time and money.  We don’t plan near as well as God does.  “Unless God builds the house, they labor in vain.”

A huge slider door was off the family room waiting to be used with no deck to walk out on.  How sad.  The view looking out the sliders I thoroughly enjoy.  God and I have had many conversations overlooking my beautiful back yard.  I’ve spent many hours, laying on the floor in front of these sliders reading books, having coffee with God and reading my Bible.  I could have enjoyed so much more with a deck there. 

….Back to the deck construction.  About half the boards were across the width of the deck big enough for a lounge chair.   I was so excited I couldn’t stand it.  Yup, you guessed it, I got up there to enjoy the partial deck.  I had my fan out, lounge chair, book and a big glass of ice tea & a beautiful hot sun just waiting to give me some vitamin D.

While I’m enjoying the view from a whole new angle, God speaks to me and says, “When you try to enjoy something premature, you don’t get all the benefits.”   Immediately I think oops, what have I missed out on?  Are there areas in my life I have rushed into and thought was so exciting I just jumped ahead of God.  Now, I’m not saying I didn’t get a nice tan, have a relaxing afternoon by myself or enjoy the view.  What I am saying is, it took a little more effort to enjoy the partial deck, since there were no steps to it yet.  The boards weren’t close enough to the house to walk out onto from the sliders yet.  There were no planters with beautiful flowers out yet, no rails, no table & chairs.  Just a partial deck in very early construction was all there was.  There was way more work to be done to enjoy all the benefits.

lessons from singleness cont.

6.) Buy yourself presents. Because it's fun. Because you can.

I have a habit of doing this. I'm making up for lost time. I don’t know why but I use to feel guilty for buying myself things. I would always spend money on the house, husband, son etc. Very rarely did I buy myself a present. Not clothes or something to use in the kitchen but just because I wanted it. My scrapbook room proves otherwise now.  It’s the first hobby that I’ve seriously had. Only I use it in the house and do it simply because I enjoy it.

7.) Go on dates with God.

I've booked a date with God on my calendar many times. He's the perfect match. He never stands you up. He keeps His word. His gifts you never want to return. They are perfect. He is faithful. He's committed to you for eternity.

8.) Help someone. Help many.

News update: you aren't going through a circumstance or have gone through something just for yourself. I was amazed how quickly God brought me women to help go through the same situation I was going through. I started opening up and sharing with people while I was going through my divorce and was amazed how many women sought me out for help, advice, prayer and just input.

Satan tries to make you isolate yourself with depression. You turn inward. When you help others you aren’t focused on yourself. Serving others helps you heal. It’s a beautiful thing all the way around. Try it.

9.) We are a family.

It took me a very long time to get this. Maybe it's not hard for you. It was for me. I couldn't think of my son and I as a family. It was broken. For the longest time I had a scrapbook album to fill and the cover said “Family” on it. I avoided using it because I didn’t feel like we were a family. It now contains vacation pictures Bryce & I took with friends to beautiful South Carolina.

10.) It's not a disease.

People will constantly try to set you up. They mean well. Dating to fill up an evening or get a free meal isn't for me. My time is valuable. Some may not understand being content single. You CAN go to an event alone. It’s okay.

story facts. (an oxymoron)

I was a senior in high school and got in my first fender-bender on the way to school.  I was turning left onto the road and another lady was turning right and BAM, we hit.  I still remember it to this day.  What I remember the most about that accident was that the officer interviewed the lady first and then came over to me and started writing out the ticket to me.  It was my fault.  I’ll take the blame.  It was an accident totally and that’s just a part of life. 

What I discovered was life isn’t fair.

The officer never bothered to ask me my side of the story, EVER.  He just wrote out the ticket and it was done.  I remember being upset, not that is was going down in history as my fault, but that he never even asked my side of the story. 

How many times do we make a conclusion about a person, situation or “story” without talking to that person directly or hearing both sides of the situation?  I admit I do it much more than I should.  This experience came back to my memory after I drew a conclusion about a situation without knowing all the facts.   How unfair that was.  Assuming can get you into a lot of trouble.  It can also make you look really, really silly. 

Whoops.

I’ve heard someone say “It’s easier to be the first to speak up than to defend something later.”  However, if you hear someone’s side of the story first it doesn’t make it the truth.  

We all know what it is like to be on the receiving end of being misjudged.  We all have been accused wrongly of something I’m sure.  It doesn’t feel the best. 

Love does not have to prove itself right.

Let them talk.  Don’t talk about them.

It amazes me how quick we believe something because we were told this is how it is.  One of the most important lessons I believe my parents taught me when it came to Christianity is to do my own research.  Don’t take any preacher’s word, youth pastor or guest speaker as “truth” without consulting The Truth.  Find that verse for yourself.  Dig and then dig some more.  “Be ready to give an answer for the hope that is within you.”  This doesn’t mean your Grandma’s hope or your Dad’s hope, but your OWN hope.  One of my new favorite lines from a book I read is “God doesn’t have any grandchildren, only children.”  

Investigate.  Do your research.

my hero

Esther is my girl.  She got it.  I hope to master it in every area of my life.  It's good to have goals at least, right? If there is one thing, and one thing only, I want my life legacy to be it would be this:

To only desire what the King desires.

I don’t just want to talk about it.  I don’t just want to desire it.  I want to live that way.

This takes practice……

I have begun evaluating my most cherished prayer requests and consciously starting out with one phrase that changes the whole moment.  Esther said it well, “If I have found favor in the King’s eyes, and if it pleases the King to give me what I ask of him.”

I think I finally figured out that this kind of prayer always wins.  If God delights in my request He grants it to me.  If God has a better plan, I win by being spared circumstances that weren’t for my good. 

Our lives don’t belong to us if we have surrendered our heart to God.  True surrender shows by your requests.  Are they driven by selfish motives?  Mine sure have been.  True surrender shows by your reaction when God gives you the answer you might not like.  I’d like to say I’ve always reacted perfectly.  I’d be lying.  You’d quit following my blog.  (or at least you should)

Psalms 37:4 Says, “Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.”  God isn’t a genie.  You don’t rub a magic lamp, God pops out, you make a wish and it comes true.  Why do we treat this verse this way?  I believe a person truly delighting themselves in the Lord has the desires of their heart planted in them by God.  The last handful of years I have tried so hard to just focus on the first part of this verse. 

We were bought with a price.  Blood.  It can’t be undone.  It’s forever.  My desires sacrificed are so mild in comparison. 


♪♫♪ "Teach me to love like You.  Break my heart for what breaks Yours"  -Hosanna by Hillsong United ♪♫♪

Proverbs 3:5-10 (MSG)

Trust God from the bottom of your heart;
   don't try to figure out everything on your own.
Listen for God's voice in everything you do, everywhere you go;
   He's the one who will keep you on track.
Don't assume that you know it all.
   Run to God! Run from evil!
Your body will glow with health,
   your very bones will vibrate with life!
Honor God with everything you own;
   give Him the first and the best.
Your barns will burst,
   your wine vats will brim over.

The above verse I know to be true.  No one could convince me otherwise.  I challenge you to experience the same.  It’s worth it. More than you can imagine.

Just ask Esther.  She went from an unknown orphan to a famous queen in history. 

lessons from singleness

I’m not an expert and in the grand scheme of life I haven’t really been single that long.  Seven years and counting.  It’s a miracle I can even write that because some days, it feels like forever.  Good thing emotions aren’t true reality.  Thankfully circumstances are temporary.  Here’s some random lessons I’ve learned.  However, I’ll start with the most important of all.

1.)  God is enough.

He HAS to be.  A husband and a baby or kids aren’t everything. You see I was lost in my identity in being a wife and mom.  I was consumed.  From a little girl it was all I wanted to be when I grew up.  It was an idol.  I have a purpose greater than those two titles in the world.  To further the kingdom of God!  However He sees best for me to do that I faithfully need to do.

2.)   Alone time is priceless; it’s productive; it’s necessary.

Do you hear that?  It’s quiet.  I’ve grown to LOVE it.  It’s one of those things that I would redo if I could.  Get more alone time.  My personality is a sanguine (outgoing and social).  Man do I love hosting people over, attending a party or just hanging out with family or a girlfriend.  I book up quick!  The younger me was never alone.  I was afraid to be alone.  The new me has gone to a movie alone & enjoyed it.  Not because no one was available but because I wanted to.  I’ve stayed in a hotel room away just for me.  I’d say I’ve made progress. 

3.)   I don’t need a husband, but I would like one.

I have an amazing church, job, house, land, car, scrapbook room……you fill in the blank.  I am extremely blessed.  I can make it on my own.  To be honest from the material things perspective I’ve done better single than when I was married.  The only debt I have is my mortgage.  I’m in the biggest house I’ve ever lived in. ETC ETC.  I would gladly give it all up tomorrow if saying “I do” required it.  However, Mr. Right is going to be worth it.  I bring a lot to the table. This brings me to the next point.

4.) Know your value

I know my worth.  I’ve worked hard at it. I don’t mean in a conceded or prideful way.  Please don’t take it this way.  I just mean don’t settle for just a man (or woman) just to be blessed married.  It’s not worth it.  I’ll stay single until God calls me home or comes back Himself.  Marriage is tons of work and I’ve said all along, the man I marry will be worth all that work.  Instead of making a mile long list of what he should have, I’ve put more energy into what I should bring.  It’s more rewarding that way. 

5.) Don’t wait around until “then”

Check things off your “bucket list” now.  Don’t sit around for him/her.  Buy that house.  Go on that vacation.  My next to do item is a missionary trip with my teenager.   Those plans are in the works.  Find your individual purpose.  I promise you it’s not just being a wife/husband and/or a parent.  I can’t tell you how many times I have said to my girlfriend or have thought to myself, when would I have time to date?  Time flies when you’re having fun.  Don’t waste today dreaming for “when.”

Being single has been worth every minute.  I’m convinced I could have never grown any other way.  God is good like that.  He knows just what we need to go through.  Trust Him, right where you are at.  Right down the path you are on.  Trust me, there’s a bend or a new road soon.  For me, as long as I’m not going backwards then things are looking up.

……….to be continued.

no vacancy

Boundaries are healthy.  Boundaries are necessary.  Boundaries are no good unless you enforce them.

Once upon a time there was this girl.  She wasn’t liked by a certain few and their mission in life seemed to be to make her life miserable.  What a sad state of purpose for someone’s day.  They said cruel things behind her back.  They said cruel things to her face.  They purposefully thought of ways to make her day hard.  Words hurt more than sticks and stones.  She took a lot of verbal abuse. 

One of my all time favorite movies is Pretty Woman.  I could probably recite a great deal of the movie if I really wanted to.  It’s the ultimate story of girl gets rescued by a boy and her life is truly changed.  Why I like it so much is that the underdog wins.

One of my favorite scenes in the movie is when Richard Gere is telling Julia Roberts that she is very bright and very special. She is says, “People put you down enough, you start to believe it. The bad stuff is easier to believe. You ever notice that?” 

Satan is the perfect liar.  He’s determined to convince you to believe the “bad” stuff about you.  If you listen long enough and entertain him, you’ll start to believe it. 

Healthy boundaries are life changing.

The girl in my story got some very sound advice and someone asked her why she rented space in her brain to those mean girls.  That is pure wisdom right there!

Don’t give in!  

Satan is out to kill, steal and destroy.  Don’t rent any space to him.  Don’t even entertain the thoughts he throws at you and dwell on them.  Go to the Word, see what God says about you and remind Satan what your creator said about you. 

God designed you, He knows the real you.  See what He sees in His love letter to you.

If you don’t know your value, you’ll believe anything.

Remind yourself that you were His idea……..