if momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy……really?

I have never been a fan of using that phrase.  I tend to cringe inside when I hear someone say that phrase too. More so, I hope I never hear that’s how I’m acting.  I’m not saying I’m not guilty, AT ALL.  I have been known to have mood swings, be grumpy, crabby etc. I’m human.  Glad we got my secrets out of the closet.  I don’t want to intentionally make someone miserable because I don’t get my way.  I just don’t see how we moms would want to teach our kids that if we aren’t happy, we are going to make their life miserable (or treat a husband that way either).  Isn’t that what that phrase is saying?  I think that is called manipulation. 

One of my favorites apps on my iPod is the dictionary.  I use it all the time.

Definition of manipulation:  to negotiate, control, or influence (something or someone) cleverly, skillfully, or deviously.  OUCH!

How many stories have you heard of controlling mothers, have been the recipient of one or have acted that way ourselves.  I can say that my mom has never made me feel guilty for not celebrating a holiday tradition her way.  She’s doesn’t have an unspoken “this is how it is and don’t you dare choose otherwise attitude” really about anything.  I have felt pressure from others in life though to do “something” because that’s how they want it and you suffer regardless.  I’m sure you all have.  I really don’t want to ever make someone feel that way. EVER.  It’s kind of like an adult two-year-old temper tantrum, on a whole other embarrassing level. 

Or another thought to those of you who are wives and have been asked the question by your husband “Honey what’s wrong?” and you answered “NOTHING!” (guilty from previous experience)  Most of the time we’re mad that he has to ask that question in the first place or mad at him for something he did and are punishing him.  This could be called “the cold shoulder.” Since we might be hurting we want him to hurt. Insert here: “If wifey ain’t happy, ain’t hubby happy either”

I loved the Amplified Bible because it’s so descriptive. Proverbs 31:12, 27 & 28 say “She comforts, encourages, and does him only good as long as there is life within her.” “She looks well to how things go in her household, and the bread of idleness (gossip, discontent, and self-pity) she will not eat. Her children rise up and call her blessed (happy, fortunate, and to be envied) and her husband boasts of and praises her”  

Philippians 2: 4 & 5 [AMP] Let each of you esteem and look upon and be concerned for not [merely] his own interests, but also each for the interests of others. Let this same attitude and purpose and [humble] mind be in you which was in Christ Jesus: [Let Him be your example in humility:]

Moms/wives, we can be the heart and soul of a family.  Our family reflects us in so many ways.  What does your family look like? Learn from you? Say about you? 

……just a thought to chew on.